More jokes

Here are some more jokes from "The Joke Game" (See previous post)



Q: What does a cannibal use for a menu?

A: The phone book.



Q:What happened to the thief who stole a calendar?

A: He got 12 months.



Q: When does a woman enjoy a man's company?

A: When she owns it.



Q: Where does satisfaction come from?

A: A satisfactory



Q: Why did the taxi driver quit his job?

A: People kept talking behind his back. (or "People kept telling him where to go")



Q: What did the policeman say to the mime?

A: "You have the right to remain silent."



Q:What do you call an unemployed jester?

A: Nobody's fool.



Q:Why was Adam the happiest man who ever lived?

A: No mother-in law.



Q: What is the difference between a terrorist and a woman with PMS?

A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.



Q: Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie?

A: He was too far out, man.



Q:Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

A: To get to the bottom.



Q: What's the difference between a man and a dog?

A: One wears trousers, the other one pants.



Q: How can you tell if a liberal politician is dead?

A: His heart stops bleeding.



Q: What stands behind every successful man?

A: An amazed woman



Q: What's fat and drinks lots of coffee?

A: Java the Hut.



Q: What did the mobster's son tell his dad after failing the exam?

A: "They questioned me for three hours, but I didn't tell them anything."



Q:What do you give an elephant with diarrhea?

A: Plenty of room.



Q: How did the critic review the new restaurant on the moon?

A: "Great food, but no atmosphere."



Q:What do you call 100 rabbits jumping backwards?

A: A receding hare line.



Q: What do you call a man who has lost 90% of his brain?

A: A widower.



Q:Why did the dolphin kill himself?

A: He had no porpoise in his life.



Q:What do you call a cow with no legs.

A: Ground beef.




Q: Why didn't the dinosaurs allow the tyrannosaurus to drive?

A: Tyrannosaurus wrecks.